missameliaandsir

Thoughts on an ever-evolving life

Archive for the month “May, 2017”

Distance

Blog Post-5-13-2017-Distance

You are there
I am here
All we want
Is to be near

A simple touch
A delicious taste
Even one second
We wouldn’t waste

The anticipation
Grows and flames
The aching passion
Plays wicked games

You are waiting
I count the days
Until we’re together
And ignite ablaze

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Loss

Blog Post-5-13-2017-Loss

First:
You don’t believe
You can’t accept
You refuse to acknowledge
You become numb

Then:
It hurts
It aches
It burns
It damages

Next:
You cry
You scream
You question
You mourn

Eventually:
Searching for acceptance
Searching for condolence
Searching for comfort
Searching for a safe place for the memories to live

Finally:
Remembering
Smiling
Accepting
Forever Loving

Blog Post-5-13-2017-Loss2

All my Love to C XOXOXO!

Zip It!

Blog Post-5-11-2017-Zip It!

OMFGAWD!!
I DID IT!!
I CONQUERED THE ZIP LINE COURSE!!

For those who don’t know, this Bitch is TERRIFIED of heights. Always have been. Recently, since coming to terms with my own depression, and helping my daughter battle hers, I have decided to say “Fuck It” whenever possible, and practical. SO, this last weekend, when Professor and I went away for a much needed couple’s weekend, I planned a surprise. We went to a 5 line course near where we were staying. He couldn’t believe I was even going to attempt it, and actually, neither did I. This is where my new “Fuck It” attitude came into play.
As my knees knocked and my stomach tried desperately to purge itself of all contents, I suited up and did the first short zip. Our guides were AFUCKINGMAZING and helped me fly. It was easy and I was smiling when I reached the end.
We were informed that we had to have a Zip Call Name, so I quickly became Vixen. No surprise there.
The second zip wasn’t too bad either. A little higher and faster, but completely doable.
The third zip sent you even higher, further and ended up in a tree on a platform. I must admit I was beginning to shake even more, but I did it.
The fourth zip took you through the tree tops and was the longest yet. I had already come this far, so I flew again.
Now comes the fifth zip. That son of a bitch is 44 feet further than a quarter mile, and sails you way up over the tree tops. The picture above is actually of that run. I decided I wasn’t going to chicken out now, so I took a deep breath and jumped. My heart was racing even faster than I was whizzing along, but the views were spectacular, the wind in my face was glorious and as I arrived on the other side, Professor greeted me with a HUGE smile, hug, kiss and possibly a tear threatening to overflow. To see the pride on his face made every shaky moment TOTALLY worth it!
Would I do it again you ask? The answer is yes, but can’t say it’s something I plan on doing on any kind of regular basis. I conquered a fear that has held me back in the past. I still have fears, and probably always will, but from now on, sometimes, I’m just going to say “Fuck It” and Fly!!

Spring

Blog Post-5-11-2017-Spring

Winter’s bitter white fades
Slowly giving way to the green buds of new life

Rivers energizing along their frozen shoals
To thunder again with rushing animation

Song birds returning home
Fledging their legacy anew

Forests, valleys, hills and mountain tops
Burst to life with the genesis of spring

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